Mushrooms are magic.
Did anyone ever really expect that truffles, which normally look like testicles, would be declared “the diamond of the kitchen” by Brillat-Savarin? That the fungus that happens to grow on cow shit (and taste like shit, conveniently) would become legendary among high school punks? Even the lowly portobello has become a lifesaver for asshole vegetarians who want to feel included at barbecues. After I saw the last episode of David the Gnome (the one where he kicks it and turns into a tree) as a kid, I began to believe that mushrooms were the dead souls of dryads. It definitely made eating them more interesting.
There’s something about mushrooms that makes them seem like they’d be the perfect pre-game meal for a homicidal maniac. Isn’t it easy to imagine Buffalo Bill hovering over a mushroom risotto, clad head-to-toe in his woman suit? Is it just me?
But onto today’s foodie shit!
Porcini Ravioli with Pan-Roasted Shiitake Mushrooms
- A thing of porcini-themed ravioli
- A handful of shiitake mushrooms (chop if you feel like it)
- 1 shallot, chopped
- 2 cloves of garlic, chopped
- A bit o’ butter
- A tablespoon or two of olive oil
- A faint whisper of truffle oil
- A few sprigs’ worth of fresh thyme leaves
Get a pot of salted water boiling over high heat!
In the meantime, heat the olive oil in a pan over medium-high heat until it looks good and sexy. Toss the mushrooms in and season with salt and pepper. Don’t move them around too much or I’ll kill you. Cook until brown(er).
Add the garlic, butter, thyme and shallots to the pan and cook the mess for a while. Once they look done, take the pan off the heat and drizzle a little truffle oil on top.
Hopefully the water is boiling by now. Toss the ravioli in and wait until they get puffy.
Serve the mushrooms on top of the ravioli with a bit of freshly grated cheese and a tall glass of soy milk!
